i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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