my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
