HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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