Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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