If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
