He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
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his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
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its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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