david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize