He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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