I think scott just propositioned me for sex
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
