I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week