so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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