Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
