do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
