i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
