You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Randomize
