so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize