nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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