i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ladies don't puke and tell
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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