What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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