Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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