think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize