he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I need a beard to bite.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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