ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
