you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Randomize
