dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
