I want to walk on stilts...naked
he wants to bone in the snuggie
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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