IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
