She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
