Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
