3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
tell me about the fingering
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
