if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize