Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
