id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
