At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
