he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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