Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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