I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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