so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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