Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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