i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
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