Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize
