i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
