We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
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