whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
