im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
