so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Randomize
