Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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