Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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