I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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