Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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