Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
operation have a gay friend backfired
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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