Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
